Lost Loves

Today in the car, I was listening to Pat Green’s latest CD called “What I’m For.” The song that caught my attention was called “Carry On.”

The song is about “being a little bit tired of the city” and all the B.S. we put up with in our every day lives. He suggests that maybe we all need to get away in “a little bit of old top down.”

I had a little bit of old top down…once. It was a little red Mazda Miata – B.K. – Before Kids. Literally right before kids. I was pregnant with my first son when I had it. Imagine a 5’5” very pregnant woman trying to get in and out of a low-to-the-ground, tiny sports car and you’ll see the humor in it. Graceful as I tried to be, I failed. The belly was just too much. Some guy rear-ended me in that car and when I wrestled myself – protuberance first - from the car to survey the damage I thought he was going to need an ambulance. I at least felt vindicated.

I still miss it. Fifteen years later, I’m still pining for it. I see one on the road and I look longingly at it. Hubby number two pressed hard to get rid of it since it only sat two. Yes, that’s just one reason he’s hubby number two. Of course, my dad was never a fan of the car and neither was my main client, also a man, who worried about my safety. They both said, “Not safe, Sue. Think about your son.”

So here I am, rag topless, with the son, thank God, still safe. I’m sure it’s in no small part due to my choice of cars over the years. But I do confess that as I sit here pining, I am counting down the days until he goes to college or has his own car and I can get my hands on a little red ragtop again.