Sue Reddy Silverman

From Sex in The City

2011-10-04T03:16:00.001-07:00

“Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free til they find someone just as wild to run with them.”

Our Deepest Fear by Marianne Williamson

2011-10-04T03:14:00.000-07:00

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

For more info http://skdesigns.com/internet/articles/quotes/williamson/our_deepest_fear/

Minutes and Years

2011-08-31T08:22:00.000-07:00

Benjamin Franklin said, "If we take care of the minutes, the years will take care of themselves." One minute. It doesn't seem like much. However, never underestimate the cumulative effect of each minute we live.

Let's suppose, for example, a minute is worth one penny. You see a penny lying on the street but pass it by because it is hardly worth the effort of leaning over to pick it up. But suppose you began to double that penny each day for a month. At the end of a week, you would only have sixty-four pennies. I know that's not much but at the end of a month you would have 536,870,912 pennies. Translated into dollars, that's $5,868,709.12.

The value we place on each minute of every day will have a cumulative impact on the remainder of our lives. Glenn Van Ekeren

Itchy

2011-08-26T05:10:00.001-07:00

I promised to write something every day. Today I am not only thoughtless, but itchy as Hurricane Irene bears down on the eastern United States. And I mean physically itchy. My skin itches and it’s so annoyingly distracting.

It’s Friday and I am ready for the weekend. I have a full day at work to get through however, and my boss is a powerhouse of energy. So the day is going to chock full of activity.

Guess I better get to it.

Finally ME Time

2011-08-25T05:08:00.001-07:00

In my effort to write once a day for ten minutes, I have been frustrated that I can’t sit down at the same time of the day. However, it occurred to me through my work that the key to success is to be adaptable. So I am here instead of in my pjs in the dark before the dawn, fully dressed for work with the light streaming into my quiet house because everyone has been sent on their way.

This morning, running through my mind are a multitude of thoughts. There is a hurricane coming, thought to hit us earlier, that is now making her way up the East Coast. I wonder about all the people I know up there and how they are going to fare.

I am grateful. Always. I never forget to be grateful. But today, despite the hurricane not coming here, I am always most grateful that we all have our health. I have been dieting and exercising as of late. Yesterday, I stretched. I have not been very physically fit for a few weeks, and definitely slacked over the past few months since I have a job now out of the house. The stretching felt so good. And today as a result, I am a bit stiff, but it’s a good stiff. I can’t wait to do more.

I am also wondering about people I heard about recently and how human nature works. A woman who was a nurse or doctor’s assistant married the doctor who of course left his wife to do so. They have oodles of money, kids go to private schools, colleges of their choosing and now they are traveling this year. Globetrotting essentially. Israel, Europe, all over the U.S. and I hear the woman is still wanting. What could she possibly want you ask as I did naively? Better sex.

So I ask myself, and you? Is that the bottom line? Is having great sex the bottom line to happiness? I wonder.

Keys and a Credit Card

2011-08-23T05:17:00.000-07:00

As a result of my research and writing romantic suspense with heros from the Navy SEALs, I have been fortunate enough to have developed a friendship with a former 20-year veteran of the Teams. This is a friendship I cherish not just because he’s a great guy, but because every day I learn from him. These are life lessons, gems, he serves up and they always take the form of something obvious, turned smart and edgy, and delivered bluntly as only he can.

The most recent lesson was called keys and a credit card.

We were talking about vacations; vacations, in particular, with other families. And he said he was going to relax until anyone in the group decided to start making plans. He said that plans were what his assistant made for him during the work week and on vacations he stayed away from plans. So I asked, “What would happen if they make plans?” He said simply, “I have keys and a credit card.”

I laughed, of course, as I always do, for two reasons: the obvious simplicity of the statement

and his deadpan delivery.

But his words stayed with me. And I took them to heart. Many times, in recent years, I have found myself using my husband as my pocketbook. I leave my bag behind, no cell phone, no wallet, no ID, certainly no money or credit card and definitely no keys. I have nothing. And it occurred to me how much of my independence I’d given away and gotten accustomed to living without.

So this past weekend, I took my purse. I had keys, cash and a debit card. I even drove. It was a start.

2011-08-22T10:31:00.001-07:00

"You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have

the courage - pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically - to

say no to other things. And the way to do that is by having a

bigger yes burning inside."



-- Stephen Covey

Writing Prompt

2011-08-22T05:07:00.000-07:00

Today is the first day of my new routine. It coincides with the first day of school, cause I have to be up early to get my kids off, but I thought what a better time than now to start my own new productive and healthy routine. “Writing to the Bone” is a book I am going to order to get me going. My radio co-host Alex Crabtree, an exceptional writer, turned me on to this concept. It’s just to dedicate 10 minute a day at the same time of the day to writing. So I am and while this is not anything earth shattering, it’s a start and my second blog post in eons.

My Man Alex

2011-08-21T17:26:00.000-07:00

My man Alex, the person behind the satiny voice as my co-host on blogtalkradio.com/extremewritingnow, is a lover of many things:

He prefers color to black and white and is a backwoods rock and roll music lover.

He likes his breakfast full of comfort foods; his coffee and his women apparently sans whipped cream.

He likes to be tied up with rope by a tall, shapely street-smart barefoot Italian brunette w boobs who is way too young for him.

He likes her hands but prefers her more oral abilities using her mouth and tongue

He’s into satin and leather, wears his beard with a day’s growth of stubble.

He takes his Patron or Rum and Coke with steak but hold the veggies, cause he prefers fruit.

He will be dressed in jeans (briefs underneath) his tatts proudly displayed. He will bring you flowers then take you back to his place for a quiet night at home, watching Goodfellas on DVD, listening to Dylan and reciting Edgar Allen Poe.

2011-04-11T12:46:00.001-07:00

"When we walk to the edge of all the light we have & take the step into the darkness of the unknown, we must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for us to stand on or we will be taught to fly." Patrick Overton

2011-03-29T09:40:00.001-07:00

Tequila and Salt

This should probably be taped

to your bathroom mirror

where one could read it every day.

You may not realize it,

but it's 100% true.

1. There are at least two people in this world

that you would die for.

2. At least 15 people in this world

love you in some way.

3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you

is because they want to

be just like you.

4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone,

even if they don't

like you.

5. Every night,

SOMEONE thinks about you

before they go to sleep.

6. You mean the world to someone.

7. You are special and unique.

8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever,

something good comes from it.

10 When you think the world

has turned its back on you

take another look.

11 Always remember the compliments you received.

Forget about the rude remarks.

So.........

If you are a loving friend,

send this to everyone,

including the one that sent it to you.

If you get it back, then they really do love you.

And always remember...

when life hands you Lemons, Make Lemonade

ask for Tequila and Salt and call me over!

Good friends are like stars.......

You don't always see them,

But you know they are always there.

"Whenever God Closes One Door He Always Opens Another, Even Though

Sometimes It's Hell in the Hallway"

I would rather have one rose and a kind word

from a friend while I'm here

than a whole truck load when I'm gone.

Forward to all your friends.

And don't tell me you're too busy for this..

Don't you know the phrase

"stop and smell the flowers"?

See how many "bouquets" you end up with!

Happiness keeps You Sweet,

Trials keep You Strong,

Sorrows keep You Human,

Failures keeps You Humble,

Success keeps You Glowing,

But Only

God keeps You Going

Meditation

2011-03-11T10:43:00.000-08:00

This is a meditation I re-discovered just last night from Thich Nhat Hanh's book (copyright 1990) "Present Moment Wonderful Moment - Mindful Verses for Daily Living."

Words can travel thousands of miles. May my words create mutual understanding & love. May they be as beautiful as gems, as lovely as flowers.

I thought it apropos now that I'm doing a radio show Sunday nights at 6:30 p.m. EST on blogtalkradio.com/extremewritingnow with my friend with the smooth as silk voice Alex Crabtree.

Tune in. Call in. Join the chat. See you then.

2011-01-11T10:20:00.001-08:00

"Do not wait; the time will never be 'just right.' Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along." -- George Herbert

2011-01-11T10:19:00.002-08:00

“Failure is never final and success is never ending. Success is a journey, not a destination." -- Ben Sweetland

2011-01-11T10:19:00.001-08:00

"You are not here merely to make a living. You are here to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, and with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world. You impoverish yourself if you forget this errand." Woodrow Wilson

I am so proud to be an American! Keith Olbermann is BRILLIANT!!

2011-01-10T06:19:00.000-08:00

Do yourself a favor. Watch this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iq38Nnf4pOw

Drinks for Women and Men - Funny

2010-12-28T09:06:00.000-08:00

Before you order a drink in public you should read this. Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could define a woman's personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results:

WOMAN DRINKS AND WHO THEY ARE.

Drink: Beer
Personality: Casual, low-maintenance; down to earth.
Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.

Drink: Blender Drinks
Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the ass.
Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabana boy.

Drink: Mixed Drinks
Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance, has very picky taste; knows EXACTLY what she wants.
Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. If she's interested, she'll send YOU a drink......

Drink: Wine (does not include White Zinfandel)
Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated yet giggles.
Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend quiet evenings with my friends.

Drink: White Zinfandel
Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually, she has NO clue.
Your Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is..this should be an easy target.

Drink: Shots
Personality: Likes to hang with pals and looking to get totally drunk... and naked.
Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You have been blessed. Nothing to do but wait, however, be careful not to make her mad!

Drink: Tequila
No explanations required - everyone just KNOWS what happens there.

MAN DRINKS & WHO THEY ARE

The deal with guys is, as always, very simple and clear cut:

Domestic Beer: He's poor and wants to get laid.
Imported Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Wine: He is hoping that the wine will give him a sophisticated image to help him get laid.
Whiskey: He doesn't give a damn about anything but getting laid.
Tequila: He is thinking he has a chance with the toothless waitress.
White Zinfandel: He's queer.

Great Shows Scheduled at the Miramar Cultural Center

2010-12-15T06:37:00.000-08:00

The exciting season continues at the beautiful Miramar Cultural Center with Holiday shows, Family Shows, Ballet, Opera, Chinese Acrobats and a Broadway Revival, plus Pop Art: an exhibition at the Ansin Family Art Gallery.

Ballet Etudes of South Florida proudly presents its 36th anniversary performance of "The Nutcracker" with international guest stars and a cast of over 100 dancers. The magical production features lavish sets and scenery, colorful costuming, exquisite lighting, superb choreography, and delightful theatrical effects. Ballet Etudes' Nutcracker production is under the direction of Artistic Director Susana Prieto. Friday - Sunday December 17, 18 and 19, 2010 at 3 p.m. except for additional performance Saturday at 8 p.m.*Ticket prices for all performances are $40 and $50 with Gala patron VIP seating available for the Saturday performance at 8 p.m. for $75.

The Dance Theatre of Harlem, celebrating their 42nd Anniversary, is bringing the leading dance institution of unparalleled global acclaim to perform at the Miramar Cultural Center for one performance only. Friday, February 11, 2011at 8 p.m.*Tickets: $25, $30 $35.

Five-time Tony Award Winner, including for BEST MUSICAL, THE MUSIC MAN follows fast-talking traveling salesman Harold Hill as he cons the people of River City, Iowa, into buying musical instruments and uniforms for a boy's band he vows to organize - despite the fact he doesn't know a trombone from a treble clef! His plans to skip town with the cash are foiled when he falls for Marian, the town librarian. Chaos ensues as the townsfolk get wind of his scheme. Filled with classical musical fun, tender romance and favorites, including "Ya Got Trouble," "Seventy-Six Trombones," "Goodnight My Someone," "Gary, Indiana" and "Till There Was You," THE MUSIC MAN is the perfect All-American Musical! Saturday February 12, 2011 at 8 p.m. *Tickets $25, $30, $35.

Opera International brings three beloved operas to the luxurious Miramar Cultural Center accompanied by the Russian National Symphony, beginning with Lucia Di Lammermoor. In a feud between the Scottish families of Ravenswood and Lammermoor, Enrico (Lord Henry Ashton of Lammermoor) has gained the upper hand over Edgardo (Edgar of Ravenswood), killing his kinsmen and taking over the estate. By the time of the opera’s action, however, Enrico’s fortunes have begun to wane. In political disfavor, he stakes all on uniting his family with that of Arturo (Lord Arthur Bucklaw), whom he means to force his sister, Lucia (Lucy Ashton), to marry. Tuesday, January 25, 2011 at 8 p.m. *Tickets $40 and $45.

Turandot is the story of the conversion of an ice princess through the power of love, placed in ancient Peking, provides the essential elements for grand opera – passion, dramatic tension, an exotic locale. Puccini gifts us with one glorious aria and ensemble after another. Tuesday, February 22, 2011 at 8 p.m. *Tickets $40 and $45.

Madama Butterfly opens in Japan in the early 20th Century. On a flowering terrace above Nagasaki harbor, U.S. Navy Lieutenant B.F. Pinkerton inspects the house he has leased from a marriage broker, Goro, who has just procured him three geishas and a wife, Cio-Cio-San, known as Madama Butterfly. Tuesday, March 22, 2011 at 8 p.m. *Tickets $40 and $45.

Astonishing athletes defy gravity and execute breathtaking feats as they stretch the limits of human ability in the spellbinding New Shanghai Circus. CBS News calls the show "fantastic," and sold-out audiences marvel as they watch this talented troupe of fearless performers with boundless energy bring to life more than two thousand years of Chinese circus traditions. Shanghai's acrobats, jugglers and contortionists defy gravity and delight adults and children alike with spectacular flair and limitless imagination. Dazzling costumes, awe-inspiring sets and incredible choreography make Shanghai Circus an amazing experience for the whole family. Sponsored by the United Chinese Association of Florida, OCA-South Florida Chapter and the Florida Chinese Federation.Sunday, March 20, 2011 3 p.m. *Tickets $15, $25, $35

Then we have the Family Fun Series beginning with “If You Give A Cat A Cupcake.” First there was the Mouse - then the Pig - now, here comes the Cat! Based on the newest installment in the zany "If You Give A . . ." book series, Omaha Theater brings this madcap world premiere production with music to the stage. Saturday, January 15, 2011 at 11 a.m. *Tickets: $14.

Followed by “Jungle Book” -- Come along on an extraordinary musical adventure with Mowgli, the boy raised by wolves in the jungle. With the help of his friends--the bear Baloo, the panther Bagheera and the python Kaa--Mowgli learns to survive as they teach him about "Jungle Law." This wonderful adaptation of the Rudyard Kipling story will delight and amuse audiences of all ages! Saturday, February 19, 2011 11 a.m. *Tickets: $14.

And “Fancy Nancy and other Storybooks” features six delightful stories in Theatreworks USA's musical revue performed by a five-member cast who portray dozens of characters throughout the show. Saturday, April 16, 2011 at 11 a.m. *Tickets: $14. All Family Fun Performances Presented by The Broward Center for the Performing Arts. The books featured are:

FANCY NANCY - Nancy just doesn't understand why she's the only one who appreciated the value of frilly accessories and a prodigious vocabulary. It's time to teach her family how to be fancy!

BABYMOUSE, THE MUSICAL - Curtain up, light the lights! Will the irresistible, irrepressible Babymouse win the lead in the school musical or will Felicia Furrypaws steal the show?

DUCK FOR PRESIDENT - The winds of change are blowing, and a politically ambitious Duck is leading the revolution! But can he bring a new bill to Capitol Hill?

I HAVE TO GO! - Andrew insists that he doesn't need to use the restroom, but once he's zipped, snapped, buttoned, and buckled in the backseat, he hears the call of nature.

LEONARDO, THE TERRIBLE MONSTER - Though he isn't big and he can't seem to frighten anyone, Leonardo just knows he can scare the tuna salad out of the biggest scaredy-cat.

PIRATES DON'T CHANGE DIAPERS - When Jeremy Jacob's old seafaring mateys show up to claim a buried treasure, they wake up his little sister, and the whole piratical crew must go on.

Recently opened at the Ansin Family Art Gallery inside the Miramar Cultural Center is Pop Art in America: From the collection of the Museum of Art | Fort Lauderdale, Nova Southeastern University. This exhibition samples the work of the best known of American Pop artists. Pop art originated in the mid-20th century, and was rooted in the imagery of pop culture and advertising. Artists such as Andy Warhol, Robert Rauschenberg, James Rosenquist and Roy Lichtenstein embraced mass media, and often employed mechanical processes to create their work rather than those traditionally associated with fine art. The Ansin Family Art Gallery is open Monday, Wednesday & Friday 10 a.m. – 4 p.m.; Tuesday & Thursday 10 a.m.– 7 p.m. Donations are suggested.

The Miramar Cultural Center/ArtsPark is located at 2400 Civic Center Place, Miramar, FL 33025, on Red Road north of Miramar Parkway. If purchasing tickets in person at the Box Office, please note new Box Office hours: Tuesday - Saturday, Noon - 5 p.m. & two hours prior to showtime. Call 954-602-4500 or visit www.MiramarCulturalCenter.org. Group Sales 954-462-0222. *Box Office fees apply.

The Miramar Cultural Center ArtsPark, in partnership with the Broward Center for the Performing Arts, is a collaborative effort of many who share a fundamental commitment to the arts as essential to building a strong and vibrant community. The project is funded in part by Broward County through the Broward County Board of Commissioners with proceeds from 2000 Safe Parks & Land Preservation Bond. The Center also acknowledges the support of the State of Florida Department of State, Division of Cultural Affairs, the Florida Arts Council, and the National Endowment for the Arts.

I have heard this in many versions and still love it.

2010-12-13T05:44:00.001-08:00

"If all of our misfortunes were laid in one common heap whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be
contented to take their own and depart." -- Socrates

2010-12-06T10:30:00.000-08:00

Not all of our qualities are admirable. In fact, some embarrass us. There is nothing preventing us from developing more positive characteristics, but the inspiration to do so often wanes. It might be more reasonable to strengthen the good ones with more frequent use and learn to love the rest as evidence of our very human nature.

We are complex personalities. We have been years in development, and we aren't finished yet. Each day gives us opportunities to demonstrate a whole range of qualities. We can accept each personal trait that doesn't mean we have to love every aspect of what we say or do. Nor does it mean we should never try to change.

But taking our life, our behavior, more in stride will give us the heart to change what we can. I am both good and bad. If I want to accentuate my positive traits, it is up to me to practice them today.

From the book "A Woman's Spirit" by Karen Casey

2010-12-01T08:49:00.001-08:00

"You can take from every experience what it has to offer you. And you cannot be defeated if you just keep taking one breath
followed by another." -- Oprah Winfrey

I am thankful for ...

2010-11-23T07:00:00.000-08:00

the mess to clean up after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends.

the taxes I pay because it means that I am employed.

the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough.

my shadow who watches me work because it means I am out in the sunshine.

a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing because it means I have a home.

the spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking.

all the complaining I hear about our government because it means we have freedom of speech.

my huge heating bill because it means I am warm.

the lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means that I can hear her.

the piles of laundry and ironing because it means my loved ones are nearby.

the alarms that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I'm alive.

weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day, because it means I have been productive.

Be thankful - not only at Thanksgiving, but every day.

The History of Thanksgiving

2010-11-23T06:53:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving is celebrated as a legal holiday on the fourth Thursday of November in the United States. It is a time to express one's thanks for good fortune throughout the year.

The first big Thanksgiving celebration, however, is said to have taken place in 1621 in Plymouth, Massachusetts. The Pilgrims and Indians feasted for three days to celebrate their rich harvest after suffering a severe winter following the Pilgrims' long, harsh journey to America on the Mayflower. The first Thanksgiving Proclamation was issued on June 20, 1676.

In 1789, George Washington proclaimed November 26th as Thanksgiving Day in honor of the adoption of the United States Constitution.

Through the efforts of Sarah Josepha Hale, the editor of Godey's Lady's Magazine in Boston, Thanksgiving became a national holiday observed on the same day every year. She proposed the fourth Thursday of November because November 26th, the day George Washington had originally selected, had been the fourth Thursday. In 1863, President Lincoln acted on Hale's suggestion and proclaimed the fourth Thursday of November as Thanksgiving Day.

Thanksgiving has, since 1863, been celebrated on that day-with a few exceptions. In 1865, President Andrew Johnson changed Thanksgiving to the first Thursday in December. In 1869, President Ulysses S. Grant selected the third Thursday in November. In 1939, President Franklin D. Roosevelt set November 23rd as Thanksgiving Day. In 1941, he proclaimed the fourth Thursday as Thanksgiving in all the states and U.S. possessions. We have continued to celebrate Thanksgiving on this day ever since.

Thanksgiving Day is associated with certain symbols and foods. Turkey is part of the traditional Thanksgiving dinner. Cranberries are also part of the dinner, probably because the Pilgrims had cranberries, which they found in bogs around Plymouth. The horn of plenty, or the "cornucopia," is a familiar Thanksgiving symbol. It is a symbol of earth's bounty, and reminds us how much of our food comes from the earth. Michael J. Eddleman

The Road To Happiness

2010-11-12T10:01:00.000-08:00

"The road to happiness lies in two simple principles: find what interests you and that you can do well, and put your whole soul into it -- every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have." -- John D. Rockefeller, III

Attitude Determines Attitude

2010-11-10T06:03:00.000-08:00

I woke up early today, excited over all I get to do before the clock strikes midnight. I have responsibilities to fulfill today. I am important.

My job is to choose what kind of day I am going to have.

Today I can complain because the weather is rainy or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free.

Today I can feel sad that I don't have more money or I can be glad that my finances encourage me to plan my purchases wisely and guide me away from waste.

Today I can grumble about my health or I can rejoice that I am alive.

Today I can lament over all that my parents didn't give me when I was growing up or I can feel grateful that they allowed me to be born.

Today I can cry because roses have thorns or I can celebrate that thorns have roses.

Today I can mourn my lack of friends or I can excitedly embark upon a quest to discover new relationships.

Today I can whine because I have to go to work or I can shout for joy because I have a job to do.

Today I can complain because I have to go to school or eagerly open my mind and fill it with rich new tidbits of knowledge.

Today I can murmur dejectedly because I have to do housework or I can feel honored because the Lord has provided shelter for my mind, body and soul.

Today stretches ahead of me, waiting to be shaped. And here I am, the sculptor who gets to do the shaping.

What today will be like is up to me. I get to choose what kind of day I will have!

Author Unknown

"I just did what I had to do."

2010-10-21T08:03:00.000-07:00

Courage means we do not waste precious energy on self-pity. Instead, we get on with living. We might wish we could always live a certain way, or we think we should. Since we do not, we might think it is our own fault, we might brood about our difficult lot, or we might blame others. Looking at neighbors or people we admire we may say, "Their life is so easy. They do everything right. Why can't I be like them?"

Many courageous people, thinking back on their moment of greatest courage, have said, "I just did what I had to do." In truth, no one lives an entire life without problems and times of serious challenge. We do not choose when problems come and how they come. But we do choose how we meet our difficulties, how we respond to pain or trouble. And when we stop wasting energy on poor me and bad me thoughts, our ordinary lives become courageous. Then we use our difficulties to learn new truths, to bring forth our best qualities and our greatest strengths...Unknown

Value

2010-10-12T07:21:00.000-07:00

"Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them – work, family, health, friends and spirit … and you’re keeping all of these in the air.

You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or evenshattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life."

How?

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.
Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.
Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.
Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life.
Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.
Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each together.
Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be pave.
Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find time. The quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings!
Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.
Don’t forget, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.
Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.
Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved. Life is not a race, but a journey to be savoured each step of the way…

–Brian G. Dyson, President and CEO, Coca-Cola Enterprises, during his speech at the Georgia Tech 172nd Commencement Address Sept. 6, 1996

Value

2010-10-12T07:10:00.000-07:00

This came to me today via email. While it is significant in and of itself, to me today it meant even more because I am having a bad day. Bad days for me are rare. I'm an optimist so I just don't let them get to me, but today I got hit on multiple fronts simultaneously. And today I feel as if my life is simply out of control. It's one of those days where the people and events in my life are out of sync and all my efforts seem counter productive. Today I feel like one of those poor unfortunate people you say "Oh my, at least I'm not her."

Here is a speech given by Brian Dyson, the CEO of Coke, some years back that put my day into perspective.

"Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them – work, family, health, friends and spirit … and you’re keeping all of these in the air.

You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or evenshattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for Balance in your life.

How?

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each together.

Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be pave.

Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find time. The quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings!

Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.

Don’t forget, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.

Don’t use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved. Life is not a race, but a journey to be savoured each step of the way…"

–Brian G. Dyson

President and CEO, Coca-Cola Enterprises during his speech at the Georgia Tech 172nd Commencement Address Sept. 6, 1996

Why We Forward Jokes

2010-09-28T08:19:00.001-07:00

Dedicated to my Dog Shadow who died this morning.

A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.

When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.

When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"

"This is Heaven, sir," the man answered.

"Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.

Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up."

The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

"Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler asked.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.

After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence.

As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

"Excuse me!" he called to the man. "Do you have any water?"

"Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in."

"How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog.

"There should be a bowl by the pump."

They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.

The traveler filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog.

When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree.

"What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.

"This is Heaven," he answered.

"Well, that's confusing," the traveler said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too."

"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."

"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"

"No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind."

Soooo...

Sometimes, we wonder why friends keep forwarding jokes to us without writing a word. Maybe this will explain. When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do? You forward jokes. When you have nothing to say, but still want to keep contact, you forward jokes. When you have something to say, but don't know what, and don't know how, you forward jokes. Also to let you know that you are still remembered, you are still important, you are still loved, you are still cared for, and guess what you get? A forwarded joke.

So, next time if you get a joke, don't think that you've been sent just another forwarded joke, but that you've been thought of today and your friend on the other end of your computer wanted to send you a smile.

You are all welcome at my water bowl anytime.

1,000 Marbles

2010-09-16T08:12:00.000-07:00

The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings. Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.

A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the kitchen with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it.

I turned the volume up on my radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning talk show. I heard an older sounding chap with a golden voice. You know the kind, he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business himself.

He was talking about "a thousand marbles" to someone named "Tom.” I was intrigued and sat down to listen to what he had to say.

"Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. Too bad you missed your daughter's dance recital."

He continued, "Let me tell you something Tom, something that has helped me keep a good perspective on my own priorities."

And that's when he began to explain his theory of a "thousand marbles."

"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years."

"Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900 which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now stick with me Tom, I'm getting to the important part."

"It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail,” he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy."

"So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round-up 1000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside of a large, clear plastic container right here in my workshop next to the radio. Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away."

"I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life. There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight."

"Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure if I make it until next Saturday then God has blessed me with a little extra time to be with my loved ones......

"It was nice to talk to you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your loved ones, and I hope to meet you again someday. Have a good morning!"

You could have heard a pin drop when he finished. Even the show's moderator didn't have anything to say for a few moments. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to do some work that morning, then go to the gym. Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. "C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast."

"What brought this on?" she asked with a smile.

"Oh, nothing special," I said. " It has just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. Hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out? I need to buy some marbles."

MAY ALL SATURDAYS BE SPECIAL AND MAY YOU HAVE MANY HAPPY YEARS AFTER YOU LOSE ALL YOUR MARBLES.

--Michael Quinzer

Life According ot Mel Brooks

2010-09-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

"Look, I don't want to wax philosophic, but I will say that if  you're alive you've got to flap your arms and legs,
you've got to jump around a lot, for life is the very opposite of death,  and therefore you must at the very
least think noisy and colorfully, or you're not alive."

Goals

2010-08-02T10:20:00.000-07:00

the best goal is no goal

Posted: 27 Jul 2010 01:25 PM PDT

“With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on twitter or identica.

The idea of having concrete, achievable goals seem to be deeply ingrained in our culture. I know I lived with goals for many years, and in fact a big part of my writings here on Zen Habits are about how to set and achieve goals.

These days, however, I live without goals, for the most part. It’s absolutely liberating, and contrary to what you might have been taught, it absolutely doesn’t mean you stop achieving things.

It means you stop letting yourself be limited by goals.

Consider this common belief: “You’ll never get anywhere unless you know where you’re going.” This seems so common sensical, and yet it’s obviously not true if you stop to think about it. Conduct a simple experiment: go outside and walk in a random direction, and feel free to change directions randomly. After 20 minutes, an hour … you’ll be somewhere! It’s just that you didn’t know you were going to end up there.

And there’s the rub: you have to open your mind to going places you never expected to go. If you live without goals, you’ll explore new territory. You’ll learn some unexpected things. You’ll end up in surprising places. That’s the beauty of this philosophy, but it’s also a difficult transition.

Today, I live mostly without goals. Now and then I start coming up with a goal, but I’m letting them go. Living without goals hasn’t ever been an actual goal of mine … it’s just something I’m learning that I enjoy more, that is incredibly freeing, that works with the lifestyle of following my passion that I’ve developed.

The problem with goals

In the past, I’d set a goal or three for the year, and then sub-goals for each month. Then I’d figure out what action steps to take each week and each day, and try to focus my day on those steps.

Unfortunately, it never, ever works out this neatly. You all know this. You know you need to work on an action step, and you try to keep the end goal in mind to motivate yourself. But this action step might be something you dread, and so you procrastinate. You do other work, or you check email or Facebook, or you goof off.

And so your weekly goals and monthly goals get pushed back or side-tracked, and you get discouraged because you have no discipline. And goals are too hard to achieve. So now what? Well, you review your goals and reset them. You create a new set of sub-goals and action plans. You know where you’re going, because you have goals!

Of course, you don’t actually end up getting there. Sometimes you achieve the goal and then you feel amazing. But most of the time you don’t achieve them and you blame it on yourself.

Here’s the secret: the problem isn’t you, it’s the system! Goals as a system are set up for failure.

Even when you do things exactly right, it’s not ideal. Here’s why: you are extremely limited in your actions. When you don’t feel like doing something, you have to force yourself to do it. Your path is chosen, so you don’t have room to explore new territory. You have to follow the plan, even when you’re passionate about something else.

Some goal systems are more flexible, but nothing is as flexible as having no goals.

How it works

So what does a life without goals look like? In practice, it’s very different than one with goals.

You don’t set a goal for the year, nor for the month, nor for the week or day. You don’t obsess about tracking, or actionable steps. You don’t even need a to-do list, though it doesn’t hurt to write down reminders if you like.

What do you do, then? Lay around on the couch all day, sleeping and watching TV and eating Ho-Hos? No, you simply do. You find something you’re passionate about, and do it. Just because you don’t have goals doesn’t mean you do nothing — you can create, you can produce, you can follow your passion.

And in practice, this is a wonderful thing: you wake up and do what you’re passionate about. For me, that’s usually blogging, but it can be writing a novel or an ebook or my next book or creating a course to help others or connecting with incredible people or spending time with my wife or playing with my kids. There’s no limit, because I’m free.

In the end, I usually end up achieving more than if I had goals, because I’m always doing something I’m excited about. But whether I achieve or not isn’t the point at all: all that matters is that I’m doing what I love, always.

I end up in places that are wonderful, surprising, great. I just didn’t know I would get there when I started.

Quick questions

Question from a reader: Isn’t having no goals a goal?

Quick answer: It can be a goal, or you can learn to do it along the journey, by exploring new methods. I’m always learning new things (like having no goals) without setting out to learn them in the first place.

Another question from a reader: So how do you make a living?

Answer: Passionately! Again, not having goals doesn’t mean you stop doing things. In fact, I do many things, all the time, but I do them because I love doing them.

Tips for living without goals

I am not going to give you a how-to manual for living without goals — that would be absurd. I can’t teach you what to do — you need to find your own path.

But I can share some things I’ve learned, in hopes that it will help you:

Start small. You don’t need to drastically overhaul your life in order to learn to live without goals. Just go a few hours without predetermined goals or actions. Follow your passion for those hours. Even an hour will do.
Grow. As you get better at this, start allowing yourself to be free for longer periods — half a day or a whole day or several days. Eventually you’ll feel confident enough to give up on certain goals and just do what you love.
Not just work. Giving up goals works in any area of your life. Take health and fitness: I used to have specific fitness goals, from losing weight or bodyfat to running a marathon to increasing my squat. Not anymore: now I just do it because I love it, and I have no idea where that will take me. It works brilliantly, because I always enjoy myself.
Let go of plans. Plans are not really different than goals. They set you on a predetermined path. But it’s incredibly difficult to let go of living with plans, especially if you’re a meticulous planner like I am. So allow yourself to plan, when you feel you need to, but slowly feel free to let go of this habit.
Don’t worry about mistakes. If you start setting goals, that’s OK. There are no mistakes on this journey — it’s just a learning experience. If you live without goals and end up failing, as yourself if it’s really a failure. You only fail if you don’t get to where you wanted to go — but if you don’t have a destination in mind, there’s no failure.
It’s all good. No matter what path you find, no matter where you end up, it’s beautiful. There is no bad path, no bad destination. It’s only different, and different is wonderful. Don’t judge, but experience.

And finally

Always remember: the journey is all. The destination is beside the point.

‘A good traveller has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.’ ~Lao Tzu

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER by Erma Bombeck

2010-08-02T10:10:00.000-07:00

 IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER
>                       by Erma Bombeck
>       (Written after she found out she was dying from cancer)
>
>                   I would have gone to bed
>                 when I was sick instead of
>                 pretending the earth would go
>                  into a holding pattern if
>                  I weren't there for the day.
>
>                 I would have burned the pink
>                      candle sculpted like
>                       a rose before it
>                      melted in storage.
>
>                 I would have talked less
>                      and listened more.
>
>                     I would have invited
>                  friends over to dinner even
>                 if the carpet was stained,
>                     or the sofa faded.
>
>                   I would have eaten the
>                     popcorn in the 'good'
>                living room and worried much
>                   less about the dirt when
>                   someone wanted to light a
>                     fire in the fireplace.
>
>                   I would have taken the
>                    time to listen to my
>                      grandfather ramble
>                       about his youth.
>
>                I would never have insisted
>               the car windows be rolled
>                 up on a summer day because my
>                     hair had just been
>                     teased and sprayed.
>
>                I would have sat on the lawn
>                   with my children and
>                     not worried about
>                     grass stains.
>
>             I would never have bought
>                  anything just because
>              it was practical, wouldn't show
>                   soil, or was
>              guaranteed to last a lifetime.
>
>             Instead of wishing away nine
>                 months of pregnancy,
>              I'd have cherished every
>              moment and realized that the
>             wonderment growing inside me
>                was the only chance in
>                  life to assist God
>                    in a miracle.
>
>                When my kids kissed me
>              impetuously, I would never
>             have said, "Later. Now go get
>               washed up for dinner."
>
>         There would have been more "I love
>              you"s.  More "I'm sorry"s.
>
>            But mostly, given another
>               shot at life, I would
>             seize every minute...look
>               at it and really see
>                it...live it...and
>                never give it back.
>
>               Stop sweating the small
>              stuff.  Don't worry about
>              who doesn't like you, who
>                has more, or who's doing
>                      what.
>
>              Instead, let's cherish the
>                relationships we have
>                  with those who
>                   DO love us.
>
>              Let's think about what God
>                 HAS blessed us with.
>
>             And what we are doing each
>              day to promote ourselves
>             mentally, physically,
>               emotionally, as well as
>                    spiritually.
>
>        Life is too short to let it pass you by.
>
>        We only have one shot at this and then it's  gone.
>         I hope you all have a blessed day.
>
>                 *  * .(\ *** /).*. *
>                     * (\ (_) /) *
>                   * . (_/   \_) . *
>                    * .  /___\  . *
>
>         In memory of Erma Bombeck and many who we all know and love
who have  lost their fight with cancer.  Here is an angel
sent to watch  over you...
>         Pass this on to the people you want watched over....
>                             I did.

Charity

2010-07-26T08:28:00.001-07:00

"If you want happiness for an hour -- take a nap. If you want happiness for a day -- go fishing. If you want happiness for a
month -- get married. If you want happiness for a year -- inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime --
help someone else." -- Chinese Proverb

What it takes to get anything done...

2010-07-26T07:52:00.001-07:00

"Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do
it." -- Raymond Chandler

Puzzles

2010-07-20T07:04:00.001-07:00

"All persons are puzzles until at last we find in some word or act the key to the man, to the woman; straightway all their
past words and actions lie in light before us." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

2010-07-20T07:02:00.001-07:00

"If people did not do silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done." -- Ludwig Wittgenstein

Curiosity

2010-07-20T06:59:00.000-07:00

"The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe
when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries
merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity."
-- Albert Einstein

The Journey

2010-07-20T06:58:00.001-07:00

Life is not a destination; it's a journey. It's not a series of goals; it's a series of steps, of events unfolding as you make your way. Life is not all about accomplishment; it's all about doing, participating, progressing, growing, and learning. Mike Hernacki

2010-07-20T06:57:00.001-07:00

"Don't let someone else's opinion of you become your reality." -- Les Brown

Drive

2010-07-20T06:56:00.001-07:00

Getting ahead in a difficult profession requires avid faith in yourself. That is why some people with mediocre talent, but with great inner drive, go much further than people with vastly superior talent. Sophia Loren

Change

2010-07-20T06:54:00.001-07:00

The only thing that one really knows about human nature is that it changes. Change is the one quality we can predicate of it. The systems that fail are those that rely on the permanency of human nature, and not on its growth and development. The error of Louis XIV was that he thought human nature would always be the same. The result of his error was the French Revolution. It was an admirable result. Oscar Wilde

Children

2010-07-01T06:52:00.000-07:00


"There are two lasting bequests we can give our children. One is roots, the other is wings."
-- Hodding Carter, Jr.

Gone...Fishing

2010-06-29T10:39:00.003-07:00

I haven't been here in quite a while and did pledge to return far more often than I have, but so much has been going on. I suppose it was time for me to indulgence in all that the world offers so that I have what to write about. That I certainly have found and look forward in August to developing a routine, which includes daily blog posting.

In the interim, enjoy the summer. I know I am.

Never Look Down

2010-06-29T10:39:00.001-07:00

"The present is a rope stretched over the past. The secret to walking it is, you never look down."
-- Sean Stewart